Friday, September 14, 2012

If you look up "Obtuse" in the dictionary, her picture is there...

Here is two minute snippet of how my deposition went on Wednesday.  (The facts have been changed to protect the guilty.)

If the witness would have simply answered "yes," "no," or "I don't know" to my questions, we could have been finished in about 3 hours.  Instead, she acted like this, and it took 6 hours:

* * * *

Me:  While Mr. X worked for you, did Mr. X receive training in Y?

Witness:  I have no personal knowledge of that.

Me:  Do you have any kind of knowledge, other than personal knowledge, regarding whether Mr. X received training regarding Y?

Witness:  No.

Me:  So would it be fair to say that you do not know whether Mr. X received training in Y while he worked for you?

Witness:  Well, I have no personal knowledge about that.  
[Editor's note:  her emphasis, not mine!]

Me:  Is there some kind of knowledge other than personal knowledge that you do have regarding whether Mr. X received training in Y while he worked for you?

Witness:  No.

Me:   So then, if you have no personal knowledge and no other kind of knowledge, do you have any knowledge about it at all?

Witness:  Well, I have no personal knowledge about it.

Me:  When I asked you whether Mr. X received training in Y while he worked for you, is there some reason that you could not simply respond "I don't know" or "I don't have any knowledge about it"?

Witness:  I'm just trying to make things clear.

Me:  It would make things very clear if you could simply answer "yes," "no," or "I don't know" to my questions.  Do you think you can do that, so that things will be more clear and so that we can finish this deposition in a reasonable amount of time?

Witness:   OK.
[Editor's note -- she's already not complying...]


Me:  Did Mr. X receive training in Y while he worked for you?

Witness:  I have no personal knowledge about that.


* * * *

Holy crap.  

Can you spell   "I-N-T-E-N-T-I-O-N-A-L-L-Y   O-B-T-U-S-E"  ?

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

A Liberal's Prayer (more email fun)


Dear Lord,

I know that I don't talk to you that much, but this year you have 
 taken away:

 my favorite  screenwriter, Nora Ephron,
 my favorite visionary, Steve Jobs,
 my favorite Science Fiction author, Ray Bradbury,
 my favorite childrens' author, Maurice Sendak,
 my favorite oldies disk Jockey, Dick Clark,
 my favorite hairdresser, Vidal Sassoon,
 my favorite Bluegrass Musician, Earl Scruggs,
 my favorite Monkee, Davy Jones,
 my favorite 60 Minutes guy, Mike Wallace,
 my favorite pop singer, Whitney Houston,
 and my favorite TV Sheriff, Andy Griffith,

 I just wanted to let you know that my favorite radio announcer is 
 Rush Limbaugh.

 Amen.