Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Tova Darling's Totally Awkward Tuesdays - Round Three (for me)

It's Tuesday, and that means it is time to participate in Tova Darling's "Totally Awkward Tuesdays" event, in which we write about something awkward or embarrassing and link to Tova's post, and she maintains a link list of those who participated.

So if you want to have a blast laughing at the awkward and embarrassing exploits of your fellow bloggers, be sure to visit Tova Darling's awesome blog (if you haven't already been there) and read all of this week's awkwardness! Here is my contribution to today's "laugh at us" festival:


When I was in middle school in Alabama in the 1970's (8th grade I believe), the "hip" slang term (at my school, anyway - I can't say whether it was "hip" anywhere else) to call someone you found annoying was "turkey." As in, "You are such a turkey!"

(You could get in huge trouble at school for calling them what you really wanted to call them, which was an a--hole or a beeyotch or a shite-head, so "turkey" had to do.)

Well, soon enough, the "hip" reply to that became, "Oh, yeah? Then eat me, pilgrim."

So one day I annoyed the crap out of my Dad somehow and he said, "You are such a turkey sometimes."

I said... you guessed it... "Eat me, pilgrim."


... awkward silence....


... and then my Dad asked whether I even knew what it meant to say "eat me."

At that point, I realized that I had been using this phrase with *no idea* that it might mean anything other than, you know, like eating turkey on Thanksgiving. (Jeepers was I naive!!)

Then I had to listen to my Dad explain oral sex to me and the slang term "eating" that was used for it (because of course this was before Al Gore invented the internet, so my Dad couldn't just tell me to go look it up at urbandictionary.com) ...


... yeah, that was awkward.

.

11 comments:

SkylersDad said...

I would rather have had a beating than have my dad explain oral sex to me.

LegalMist said...

Me too, truly... !

Gaston Studio said...

LOVE IT! And reminds me of a past colleague of mine who went around saying she "shot her wad" until her hubby explained what that was all about; and she was in her 50s!

Nyxmyst said...

Wow.. beyond ackward. I'd rather have been having a root canal.

Jenners said...

Oh.My.God. How incredibly awkward and embarrasing. I would have just died!!!!! Reminds me when I called my grandfather's car a "Grand Pricks" instead of "Grand Prix" and my mother scolded me for saying "pricks" and I had not idea why and she had to explain. Ugh.

Kim Ayres said...

:D

Jules said...

I was embarrassed enough when, in 7th grade, a 4th grader explained oral sex to me. I cannot imagine having to listen to my dad!

Dave said...

yup, awkward for sure.
Funny what time can do to make those moments where you want to crawl in a hole and die, seem funny.

Bella said...

girl, that's hilarious ...

and awkward! ha!

Gwen said...

*shudder*

My cousin did the same thing with the eff bomb. She used it in front of our grandma to describe her untied shoe. Even though I was younger, I knew what it meant and I fell over laughing at her. She's still sore about me laughing at her.

Fancy Schmancy said...

Oh, gross! You poor thing!