Best. Friend. Ever!

The other day, I posted about my "bestest friend in the whole world" who sent me the wonderful Contigo travel mugs for Christmas.  I have known her for over 40 years (yes, since preschool!), and she truly is an amazing woman.  She has raised / is raising three wonderful boys, while running a successful bankruptcy law practice in South Carolina.  She is smart and beautiful and kind and really just the BEST friend.

Today, I want to tell you that, in addition to my "bestest friend in the whole world," I also have a "best friend ever," whom I have known for over 30 years (since middle school) and who, on a whim and because we haven't seen each other for like 6 years, invited me to come visit her in Birmingham, Alabama, to see the band "Little House" (the musicians are friends of ours) play.

We are planning the trip to coincide with Do Dah Day, which is a fun annual music festival in Birmingham that has been around for 34 years (click the link above to check it out - it's awesome! - and click here for more information about the origins / history of this quirky and fun local event).  It has the usual festival things -- music, food, art, kid activities, a parade (I love a parade!), and lots of fun.  Little House is playing at the festival. 

My best friend ever used to be heavily involved in organizing and promoting Do Dah Day.  I think she has reduced her involvement in it more recently, but still attends every year.  It is a great festival and raises money every year for deserving local charities that benefit homeless animals.

My friend even offered me free plane tickets (using frequent flier miles) and a bedroom in her house so that I would have no excuse to say "no"! 

But here's the clincher, for me: The trip offers the opportunity for me to see my friend's older child, who was a newborn the last time I was there, and to meet her younger child, whose photos I have seen on Facebook but have never met, and who is totally adorable.

Needless to say, it is an offer that cannot be refused!  So I am going to Alabama for Do Dah Day!  I can't wait!

****

And I have to confess that I have at least four other "best friends" who I totally love for various reasons, not all of them having to do with receiving awesome travel mugs or free plane tickets to Do Dah Day in Birmingham.

I am truly blessed to have so many wonderful friends.  :)

And The "Best Customer Service" Award Goes To....

...Wells Fargo Bank!


Friday afternoon, I was on my way to the bank.  I stopped at the intersection in the double-left-turn lane behind several other cars, waiting to turn left.

The light changed and the cars in the other left-turn lane got to go, but my lane did not move.  Ugh.  A broken down car was two cars ahead of me.  The turn arrow changed to red again.  Ugh.

Some people were waiting to cross the street.  They crossed to the middle of the intersection by the broken down car and began getting ready to push the broken down car through the intersection when the light changed.

And then I noticed who the people were: An elderly woman, who was getting into the car to steer it, and two younger gentlemen, probably mid-20's, wearing long-sleeve dress shirts, ties, and Wells Fargo name tags.

The Wells Fargo bank tellers had volunteered to help their customer move her car out of the busy intersection and into their parking lot.

I swear, this bank is soooo much nicer than Chase Bank!

Best. Gift. Ever!

A couple of years ago, I received from my very best friend what I thought (at the time) was sort of an odd Christmas gift: Two stainless steel travel mugs.  One blue, one green.  Here are photos of them:

 (As an aside, I have few technical skills and cannot, for the life of me, figure out how to get blogger to let me put these photos next to each other instead of way across the page or one on top of the other.  Ugh.)

They are nice-looking mugs - elegant, even - but I didn't understand why my best friend in the whole world would send travel mugs across the country for a Christmas gift.  It was nice of her to send them (and it's always nice to get a gift), but sort of an odd thing to bother mailing.  After all, travel mugs are a dime a dozen, right?

Then I used them and discovered how very wrong I was...

These mugs are A M A Z I N G!!!

They do NOT leak.  At all.  Ever.  You can hold them upside down, and not a drop escapes! 

You have to push the little button that you can see there, on the "front" of the mug in the photos, to get the valve to open so you can drink your beverage.  It's not difficult to push, but is firm enough that it doesn't accidentally open.

I can put these mugs sideways in my purse, filled with coffee, and not even worry that they will leak, so long as I put the button on the "up" side and don't put anything on top of it!!  Even then, it would have to be something hard and heavy to make the button move and open the valve.  Really, I hardly even worry about it.  I just toss them in and carry them around, filled with coffee.

They keep your beverage hot, or cold, as the case may be, for HOURS.

Once, in the summer (here in Arizona, it is often 110 to 118 degrees on a July or August summer day, and gets way hotter than that inside a locked car), I forgot my mug filled with iced coffee (with a bit of cream) in the car while I went inside a store and shopped for two hours.

If I had used any other mug that day, I would have returned to the car to find hot coffee with curdled cream, disgusting and undrinkable.  Not with these mugs!  I returned and, although the ice had mostly (not completely!!) melted, the coffee was still very cold and very drinkable.  Refreshing, even, on such a hot day.

When I put hot coffee in them, it stays hot for HOURS.  I have to make sure it is a drinkable temperature before sealing it up because otherwise it will be too hot to drink for a very long time.

I LOVE these mugs.

Now you can see why she is my bestest friend in the whole world.  She knows me better than I know myself!  She knew EXACTLY what I wanted for Christmas, even when I did not know I wanted it!

If you like to carry beverages with you in the car, you should go directly to the Contigo web site (click here) and buy one (or more) of these mugs.

Sadly, my green Contigo mug met an untimely death a couple of days ago.  It was destroyed by a softball while the pitcher and catcher were warming up before my daughter's softball game the other day.  The ball smashed right into the mug and broke the lid apart.  The stainless steel portion was unharmed, but the lid was FUBAR (as we used to say in the bus business...  F--d Up Beyond All Repair).  So I will have to buy a new one.  Just trying to decide whether to stick with the lovely green I had before, or try a new color, like red or silver.

Please note:  This is absolutely not a paid promotion.  Contigo probably doesn't even know I exist.  I just totally love these mugs and I know you will, too.  My motive?  I want to keep the Contigo company in business and producing these exact mugs so that when I need new ones I will be able to buy them.  They seem to last pretty much forever, absent tragic accidents like the one my green one encountered, so I am a little afraid that they will go out of business because they won't get enough repeat customers.

Nothing Bad Happened

Lenore Skenazy, over at freerangekids.com, asked her readers to post in the comments on her blog about a time that nothing bad happened when they let their kids do something that others might have considered dangerous.  I wrote sort of a long story there in her comment section (although I confess I forgot to start with her suggested opener, "nothing bad happened when...").  I thought I might as well post it here, too.  If you'd like to read other stories about kids doing dangerous things that worked out ok, check out Lenore's blog post and comments here.  The upshot is, most kids are capable of a lot more than we give them credit for!  We should start giving them credit for being able to handle more things!

Here is my story about when nothing bad happened:

*************

I am (or at least, I was) apparently the world's worst babysitter.

Before I had kids, when I was in my late 20's, I babysat for a friend who had two kids, a boy, age 4, and a girl, age 8.

I had babysat lots when I was a teen, for a few hours at a time, and never had any problems at all, and I had been around plenty of my friends' and relatives' kids since that time, so I felt well-qualified.

My friend asked me to keep her kids at her house for a weekend, from Friday evening to Sunday afternoon.

I showed up Friday evening and brought the kids Happy Meals.  First mistake -- I thought I should get a "boy toy" for the boy and a "girl toy" for the girl, or at least two different toys so that they would, together, have more cool toys to play with.  Turns out I was supposed to get two identical toys so no one would have to be jealous that the other kid got a "better" toy.

Despite this "disastrous" start, the parents left me in charge anyway and took off for their destination, reminding me not to feed the kids too much junk food, and telling me to "have fun."

Saturday morning, the boy had a pee-wee league tee-ball game at a local park / recreation center, so I took the kids to it.  The little boy had to go to the bathroom, so I walked him to the restrooms.  He assured me he could handle the bathroom by himself, so I waited outside the men's room door while he went in.  No one else was around.  After a while, I heard the toilet flush and then the sink running, then heard "scuffling" on the other side of the door.  I pushed it gently to help the little guy open it, and he came out, smiling / happy.

Saturday afternoon, I put the little guy's booster seat in my car and took the kids to the zoo, bringing healthy snacks in the form of carrots, grapes, and mixed nuts.  The kids loved the snacks and had a great time at the zoo.

Sunday afternoon, the kids asked if we could ride bikes to the neighborhood park near their house.  I asked if they knew how to get there and they said yes.  We set out with me walking, the girl riding her "big kid bike," and the boy riding his bike with training wheels.  The girl would ride ahead and then wait for us at each stop sign.  Sure enough, she knew the way perfectly.  They wanted me to go get the car and drive them home, but I refused to leave them alone at the park in order to walk home and get the car, and so I made them ride their bikes the whole way back home.  They complained that they were tired, but we made it.  It was probably half a mile each way.  The kids were pretty tired after that, and sat and drank water and watched TV while I fixed them some dinner.  But they were happy and said they wanted me to come visit them again some time.

When the parents returned that evening, I found out I had subjected both kids, but especially the four-year-old, to many incredible and unacceptable dangers:

*  pedophiles in the bathroom! ("he's NEVER been to the bathroom by himself before!!  What if someone else had been in there?!?  What if he got stuck in the stall?!?");

*  potential choking hazards! ("admittedly somewhat unlikely but you could have at least cut the grapes in half!");

*  potential deathly allergic reaction to peanuts! ("the kids have never had nuts before!!")  [as an aside, you'd think the parents might have warned me if they were worried about that one!];

* risk of getting impossibly and irreparably lost!  ("How did you even find the park?  How were you sure you'd know the way home?!?")  [As if their 8 year old were completely incompetent to find her way home, and as if there were no other persons in the entire neighborhood to ask, if we did get lost...]

*  risk of heat stroke or heat exhaustion! ("But it's so far to the park!  They rode the WHOLE WAY there AND BACK?!?");

*  risk of dying by being run over by a car!  ("you had to cross three streets to get to the park!!") [note:  they were neighborhood streets, with one lane in each direction...].

Geez, I thought the kids and I had enjoyed a great fun weekend, one that would be the envy of any kid anywhere, but it turns out that, in fact, I am a horrible child endangerer!

They never asked me to babysit again...

*********

Have you ever subjected your kids, or someone else's kids, to an activity or situation that others judged you a "bad parent" for?

"Ask and Ye Shall Receive"... or, "Wake Up and Look Around, You Idiot!"

We had a big dust storm two days ago here in the Valley of the Sun.  The wind blew and blew, and the dust was so thick it looked like fog.  It wasn't quite a "Haboob" like the one I wrote about a couple of years ago, along with a cool video, here -- it did not have the rolling clouds of dust you get with those -- but it was very windy and dusty for most of the day.

Then in the evening, it rained for about 5 minutes.

Five minutes was just enough rain to clear the skies of all that dirt - yay! .... and deposit it all onto my poor car -- bummer!

So after the 5 minutes of rain, my car looked like I had gone off-roading for hours through the mud.  It was literally covered.  It was muddy brown instead of silver-gray.  I could hardly see out of the windshield when I got in the car to take the kids to school the next morning (yesterday).  So I drove straight to the gas station and washed the windshield.  Better for driving, yes, but my car still looked a mud cake.

It was cloudy and a little windy again yesterday so I didn't want to wash the car - figuring either it would rain and this time would rain long enough to clean my car or it would rain for 5 minutes again, just long enough to make the car dirty, and either way, washing it first was a waste of time.

It didn't rain again.  This morning, the skies were clear blue, with only a few little puffy white pretty clouds.  And my car still looked like I had taken it off-roading, which might be an OK look if it were an SUV, but it's not - it's a Lincoln Town Car - and so it just looked silly.  And crappy.  And sort of embarrassing.

So I drove over to the car wash near my house - the kind you drive through and it washes the car for you, because that's all I had time for before meeting my client before the court hearing.

Everyone else in the neighborhood apparently had the same idea, because the cars were lined up out the driveway of the car wash place and halfway up the street!  No way I had time to wait in that line.

I thought of another automatic car wash place, not too far out of the way, and drove there.  Same thing - line around the building and out into the street.  Ugh!  Passed another one on the way to the freeway -- same thing -- huge line!

I resigned myself to the fact that I was going to have to drive around with my car looking like a muddy mess, and I drove toward the Courthouse.  I stopped at the traffic light just before the parking lot for the Court building and I sat there berating myself, "Dang, I wish I could have washed my car.  I hate that all the car washes were so full this morning.  I should have done it yesterday evening...  I hope my client doesn't see this mess..."

And then I noticed it.  A car wash!  Right across the street from the Court building!  A drive-through one!  With only one car waiting to enter!

I pulled in, paid my $7, drove into the car wash with my ugly brown muddy mess of a car, and emerged from the other side in my beautiful gleaming silver Lincoln Town Car...  oh, happy day!  Suddenly everything felt brighter, lighter, and more wonderful!

I'm still not sure if all my wishing made the car wash magically appear, as if in a dream, or if it's been there all along and I just never noticed it.  Either way, it felt like a gift from heaven!

PBC - Awesome!

My daughter and I went to see the Phoenix Boys' Choir last night. (Click on the link for photos and music snippets).  She had two free tickets from her teacher (who is on the board for the Choir) and a promise of extra credit in her class if she would go.  So, we went.

They were amazingly good!

They had basically three groups, identified by the different ties and suit jackets (or, for the second half, the choir robes) they wore.  The oldest group (late teens up to one fellow who looked to be about 40) wore tuxes. The middle group (pre-teens and teens, it looked like) wore red and yellow striped ties.  The youngest group (ages 6 - 10, I believe they said) wore blue striped ties.

I was amazed by the following:

*  All of the youngest and middle groups stood on the choir stands and sang from memory, for approximately two hours worth of music.  They did not have music in front of them.  I cannot imagine my kids at age 6 -10 standing still for two hours, much less remembering all of the words and notes for two hours worth of music.  Heck, I can still barely get my 9 year old son to remember the words to "Frosty the Snowman" for his cub scouts' annual Christmas Caroling on Sesame Street venture.

* I didn't quite understand why the oldest ones got to hold the music in front of them.  Seems like if those younger kids could memorize everything, so could they!  On the other hand, they had to hold those heavy choir books out in front of them for such a long time. I can see why the younger kids wouldn't want to have to hold them the whole time.

*  They seemed to hit every note perfectly, and held them for such long periods of time.

*  They had such genuine enthusiasm for the music, and their personalities really stood out.  One small child in particular really caught my eye.  He was adorable.  He was the smallest one, and stood in the front row.  He had brown hair in a bowl shaped cut, short, and such expressive eyes, and his ears stuck out a bit which made him look soooo adorable.  He sang with such expression and passion.  And he was soooo adorable!  If I were his mom, that kid would be so spoiled because I could never say no to that cute face! The taller kid, next to him, had a voice like an angel.  You could really hear each note he projected, not that it was louder or different than the others, but he just had such power to his voice.  Amazing and beautiful.  Another, slightly older kid in the third row, right side, also had an obvious passion for the music... so earnest!  A fourth kid, a teenager, in the second row, far left (for me), looked like a young Beatle -- a cross between Paul McCartney and George Harrison, with that Beatle haircut and dark brown eyes.  Even had some of the same mannerisms as Paul. Very cool!  It was neat that their individual personalities showed through, even as they all wore the same suits and ties and looked so "uniform."


All in all, it was a great show.  I am glad we went, even though it came at the end of what seemed like an impossibly long and stressful week (which shouldn't have seemed so long and stressful because it was only a four day week after the holiday on Monday, but it did).  We didn't want to leave the house to go, but both of us ended up being glad we went.

So, if you ever have a chance to see the Phoenix Boys' Choir, you should definitely take that opportunity!

******

A little comic relief:

As the chamber orchestra was getting ready to play before the second act, they did the usual orchestra note coordination where, after they've all tuned up they all play the same note and each instrument joins in to make sure everyone is tuned up properly (at least that's what I've always assumed they are doing; I've never been in an orchestra so I could be totally wrong...)

Legal Mist's Daughter:  Oh!  I know this song!

Me (thinking she is kidding, and thus playing along):  Me, too.  I've heard it a few times before! (Big smile).

Legal Mist's Daughter, a minute or so later, realizing they are just tuning their instruments and not actually playing anything...:   Oh, no.... that's not actually a song, is it?  (covers face with hands)

Me:  You mean you weren't just kidding?!?

And then we both had to stifle our laughter because by then the program was actually starting...

Happy New Year - 2013

 

Happy New Year!

2012 was an OK year.  Could have been better. 

There were the obvious low points:  My beautiful young cousin died suddenly this past Friday, for no apparent reason, leaving my Aunt, her mother, to begin the new year by burying her youngest child.  We lost our dear doggy friend Sparky in October.  We had to pay a lot of federal taxes because of poor communication and planning about income tax withholding in 2011 -- we are still making payments on our payment plan.  Ugh. 

But even without the deaths and taxes (the only two things guaranteed in this life), I've felt a little "off" all year... too grumpy, too lazy, too tired, and/or too busy to be happy or productive this past year.

My cousin's death has me thinking that perhaps it is time to get my life in order, get my act together....  [insert your favorite cliche here].  I am lucky to be alive, really...  and I really ought to demonstrate through my actions exactly how much I appreciate that gift.

So, for 2013, I hope to be more productive, more cheerful, and kinder to everyone.  I hope this will make my small corner of the world a happier place to be.

Those are pretty grand (and vague) goals, though, and one thing I've learned is that, to accomplish big goals, we have to break them down into smaller, more manageable steps.

So, for January, my plan is as follows:

1.  Make "to do lists."  I used to do this all the time, but have fallen out of the habit.  I find myself forgetting things and not getting things done lately. Time to get out pen and paper and make lists again.

2.  Smile more.  Even when I don't feel like it.  Sometimes if I'm feeling down and I smile, I actually start to feel happier.  (Sometimes, the mind follows the body.)  Sometimes if others are feeling down and we smile at them, they actually start to feel happier.  So I will actively try to smile at least once a day when I *don't* feel like it.  It doesn't count if I'm spontaneously smiling already!  It will probably help if I remind myself of the many things I have to smile about.

3.  Do a good turn daily.  This is a scouting motto, and I think the world would be a happier place if we all followed it.  So, once a day (more if the mood strikes me), I will try to do something nice for someone - a family member, friend, or stranger.  Something unexpected and not already on my "to do" list or list of things I already do on a regular basis (holding doors for people carrying things doesn't count - I do that already).  Things like paying for a stranger's coffee at my favorite coffee shop, or giving a homeless person some food.  Emailing a friend just to tell her how wonderful she is.  Doing one of the chores my spouse ususally does.  Little things like that can go a long way toward making the world a better place.


Note:  these are not resolutions.  If I don't do them one day, I will not have "failed."  These are just things I plan to try to do, to make the year happier for myself and for others.


What are your plans for the new year?

A Too-Short Life

My Aunt will start the new year by burying her youngest child.  Suddenly my problems seem insignificant.

I got word yesterday morning that my Cousin - my Dad's youngest sister's child (the youngest of her three daughters) - died suddenly.  Her live-in boyfriend returned home from work on Friday and found her on the couch, dead.

There was no sign of forced entry into her home and there were no marks on her body, nor alcohol / pills lying around that would indicate any sort of violence or suicide.  According to the coroner, she looked "peaceful."

I am ashamed to admit that I did not know this particular cousin well, and so I don't even know exactly how old she is.  (I mean, "was.")  (God, that's hard to write).  She is (was) quite a few years younger than I am, and I have always lived hundreds or thousands of miles away from her.  My Dad was not particularly close to his youngest sister, either, and so we did not visit with her often as my cousins and I were growing up.  There is no anger or estrangement, just not a particularly close relationship.

But I do remember visiting my Aunt when I was about 35, and this particular Cousin of mine was in college at the time.  I was driving through the town my Aunt lived in, and stopped to visit for a while.  My Cousin was at my Aunt's house with a few of her friends that day, and we all had dinner together.  I am guessing she is (was) now in her early 30's.

I remember that she was beautiful, vivacious, and friendly.  I remember that she laughed a lot with her friends and family, that day that I visited.  I remember the obvious love between her and my Aunt.

As a Mom, I cannot even imagine the sadness and despair my Aunt must now be feeling.  To lose her youngest child, at a too-young age...  It hurts just to think about it.

Reminder: Eat Your Black-Eyed Peas for New Year's

My yearly reminder to all of my blogger friends:  For good luck and prosperity, you simply MUST eat black eyed peas first thing on New Year's Day (which, in my world, means they must be eaten at 12:01 a.m., along with your champagne toast to the New Year!)

For a more detailed explanation of  the reasons why you must eat black eyed peas[footnote 1] first thing on New Year's Day, please see this prior post.

For a recap of the bad luck I experienced the one and only year that I forgot to eat the darned peas, please see this prior post.

Here are some links to recipes that will make them delicious for you:

1.  Healthy and Delicious: Southern-Style Black-Eyed Peas with Bacon

I'm not sure how the word "healthy" got included in the title for a recipe that includes bacon but I can vouch for the fact that the bacon will make it delicious!

2.  Crockpot Black-Eyed Peas With Ham

Ham is good, too, and perhaps more traditional than the bacon.  In fact, real Southerners use ham hocks.  Yum!

3.  Spicy Black-Eyed Peas With Tomatoes

And in Louisiana, they like their food spicy.  (See, e.g., Jambalaya).   These are a nice change from the salty, slightly sweet versions above.


Note that the first two recipes call for dried or frozen peas, which taste better than canned, but take longer to prepare than the kind out of the can. No procrastinating if you want them ready on time!

Then again, you could probably substitute the canned peas.  They wouldn't be as delicious, of course, but it would be easier.

Or, if you actually like the canned peas (like I do), and/or if you won't be home but want to be sure you get your good-luck-peas, you can just pop open a can, dump them into a bowl, heat them in the microwave, and you are ready to go within two minutes on New Year's Eve!  Definitely lacks the gourmet flair, but it's quick and practical and will keep you from suffering horrible bad luck all year!

I wish you all the best for the coming year.  May you all be healthy, happy, and prosperous.

* * * *
Footnote 1:  That would be a good name for a punk rock band, wouldn't it?  "The Black Eyed Peas". . .

Christmas 2012

My kids made a gingerbread house.

My daughter ate the gingerbread tree already.  She said it was delicious.  It looks delicious, doesn't it?  (Good thing I got a picture first.)

We also decorated our tree.  And put the train around the base.  And bought presents and wrapped them and put them under the tree....

And I put a couple of decorations out front, to cheer up our house for the neighbors...

Check out the refurbished newspaper vending machine that my husband converted to use as our mailbox.  The plastic light-up snowman is a nice touch, don't you think?

I sent Christmas cards to a few folks.

I decorated the mantel and our green m&m...

I was hoping that if I gave her my duster, she'd use it.  (So far, not working...)

We've been to a holiday party or two.  And had lots of fun, too, actually.

But something is missing this year.  Our pal Sparky.

This is a photo of him from last winter, when we visited the snow.  He was notoriously hard to photograph -- as soon as he saw the camera, he'd come toward you trying to sniff and lick the camera.  But here he is in all his fluffy glory.

He always loved the snow.  And damp grass in the springtime.  And the mountains.  Life just isn't the same without him.

But life does go on, and it's Christmas, and I love it as always.  The decorations, the baking, the once-a-year Christmas music, the lights, the gifts, the festive atmosphere, the celebrations with friends and family, the love in the air ... I look forward to it every year, no matter what.

Merry Christmas, everyone.